PRESS ANNOUNCEMENT!
 

PRESS ANNOUNCEMENT!

London 11th August - A public school teacher was arrested today at Gatwick Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator.

At a morning press conference, Home Secretary John Reid said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the Met Police with carrying weapons of maths instruction.

"Al-gebra is a problem for us," Reid said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute values. They use secret code names like 'x` and `y` and refer to themselves as `unknowns,` but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with co-ordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle".

When asked to comment on the arrest, Prime Minister Tony Blair, speaking from his holiday resort before the planes stopped flying, aid, "If God had wanted us to have better Weapons of Maths Instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."

RE: PRESS ANNOUNCEMENT!
 

"I almost pity them in my weak moments, but then I remember they are trying to teach me!" Bart Simpson (PTA Disbands)

That is a good parody! Thanks for sharing it TechmanBD.

RE: PRESS ANNOUNCEMENT!
 

Their leader Osama Bin Mathman has released a tape with details of the weapons of math instruction. He warns that if they do not release the prisoner at once, then he will release the music video weapons of math instruction on PBS.

The country will be hit with knowledge of Percents, Perpendicular Lines, Combinatorics, and Angles. If the country still refuses to comply with his demands, he will use the ultimate weapon Probability that will blast the country back to the Roman Numerials. Each contains leathal amounts of falsetto and frightening hair styles.

This tape was broadcasted through Al-JSquare-Oni.