REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY March 31, 2006

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.


Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays
Step by Step, with Slide Presentation
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoid in The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?
Group Practice
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks

Class 5
After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 6
Loss Of Identity --- Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other
Help Line, Support and Support Groups
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming
Open Forum
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours

Class 8
Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health
Graphics and Audio Tapes
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost
Real Life Testimonials
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours

Class 11
Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife
Online Classes and role-playing
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours

Class 14
The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used
Live Demonstration
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

HAHA!!

~Amanda